Clawing to escape the belly of the beast here in Hollywood. To commiserate, email my name assistantatlas at yahoo.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

The Next James Bond: Episode 1.09

"Disney, of course, has the best casting. If he doesn't like an actor, he just tears him up."
-Alfred Hitchcock

The only thing my relentlessly geeky roommate can talk about is who the next James Bond is going to be. Seriously, dude, get a life. I have decided to weigh in, however, as this is one of Hollywood's most enduring franchises and it could be seriously fucked by Martin Campbell's remake of Casino Royale-- or could be seriously extended. Let's think what a successful Bond franchise could mean to the film industry...

Popular Bond movie [Casino Royale w/new lead]: $500 million in revenue worldwide [if Meet the Fockers can do it, Bond can]
Two more Bond movies w/same lead: at least $600 million in revenue worldwide [plus the Bond catalogue appreciates, too]

Unpopular Bond movie [one in which George Lazenby looks cooler than the new lead]: $100 million in revenue worldwide, but a loss because of the huge expense of a modern, big-budget Bond. If the other Bonds flop it could mean the end of the franchise, instead of a possible $1.1 billion in revenue.

Over one BILLION dollars. Granted, this math ain't perfect, and a successful Bond could just siphon cash from other movies, but it does show what's at stake.

So. . .

Daniel Craig? What happened to the buzz that said it was going to be a 'young Bond' who could see the franchise through to the next decade. Vanished apparently. It came down to Craig and Clive Owen. Frankly, Pierce Brosnan is MUCH cooler than either of them. Obviously, on the list of Bonds, it's . . .

#1- Sean Connery
#2- Pierce Brosnan
#3- Roger Moore
#4- Timothy Dalton
#5- George Lazenby

Although personally, I like Timothy Dalton as Bond and would put him ahead of Roger Moore in some cases. Moore got the better movies, though, in my opinion.

Anyway, the inside buzz is that the family that owns the rights got all jingoistic with it-- wanting a thoroughly British Bond, instead of one with perhaps more international appeal. Supposedly, this doomed the candidacy of my favorite dark horse, Australian Julian McMahon [TV's Nip/Tuck], among others. Neocolonialism strikes again, I guess.

In the end, I guess Craig could work out-- I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt for one, and only one, movie. Considering the time spent thinking about the next Bond on the part of myself and apparently, millions of others, I'd hope the world would get a good Bond. Just don't say I didn't warn you.


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