Clawing to escape the belly of the beast here in Hollywood. To commiserate, email my name assistantatlas at yahoo.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

VOTE! Soon. Episode 1.37

"The Poop on Ryan Seacrest's Star" Update is below this post, since [sadly] that's probably what you're looking for. Thanks to the good people at KROQ for their interview regarding the contest. Now, on to Episode 1.37. . .

Los Angeles Mayor position up for the taking– Hahn and Villaraigosa. Election or something, dude. Vote for things like propositions and stuff. Hey, where’s that voter guide they sent? Isn’t there a City Council seat. . . Yeah, Flora Gil-Krisishizlleloff. That’s who I’m voting for.

Here is the official election editorial by Assistant Atlas, on behalf of young white kids of voting age and assistants everywhere.

So, Jim Hahn has had four years to tackle the myriad problems facing Los Angeles. Other than hiring a respected police chief, what has Hahn done? Answer: jackity-jack. I'm sorry, Mr. Hahn, but you got a full term as mayor and you wasted it.

Fortunately for you, people in LA are content that you didn't totally destroy the city. Which is sad. It's also why we, the young and angry, need to vote. Hahn's opponent, Antonio Villaraigosa [why do people have such problems with his last name, it's friggin' cool], is more than qualified to take over the city. And I bet he'd do something. Sure, he wouldn't fix traffic. God couldn't fix the traffic in LA. But I get the feeling he'd do SOMETHING. Los Angeles can ill afford to put off long-term investments in infrastructure, especially mass transit, which is what Hahn has done [except LAX, where he's pushing a BLATANTLY RETARDED program instead of boosting other local airports like Long Beach, Burbank and Ontario to take the pressure off LAX].

So join me in voting for Antonio Villaraigosa on Tuesday. It's about time we had a Latino mayor in LA, anyway-- whitey's run the city for long enough.

VOTE FOR VILLARAIGOSA-- at least we don't know for sure that he totally sucks.


Blogger Janet said...

Wow, you're seriously holding a contest? And here to think all this time I thought this was tongue in cheek...

6:01 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:41 AM

Blogger Assistant Atlas said...

Stop that or I'll disable the comments. That's you, spammer.

9:31 AM

Blogger Peggy Archer said...


What's with the comment spam?

That's crazy!

I'm still offering myself as a getaway driver for whomever wants to do this.

8:39 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

New Program - $1,200 a Week - G_U_A_R_A_N_T_E_E_D!

No_Sponsoring_Required - Not M.L.M!


Give me a call if I can help you.

Bob Everett
9 AM - 11 PM EST

12:39 PM

Anonymous Batrabbit said...

I just need a get me there from Portland Oregon driver, It would be even better if there was an official police record. How much could they really charge me with. I don't think it counts as biological warfare.

4:06 PM


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