Cocaine and Ketamine- NOT to Be Confused: 3.16
Famke, myself and a few [of her] friends went out for some happy fun times last night because neither of us had to work on Labor Day. After several beers and getting nice and loosened up, one of her friends' friends, who I'll call Maryjane, asked if I wanted a bump of coke. Normally, I try to avoid coke, thanks to my near-addiction to it during my wild days at USC, but I was feeling saucy [read: sauced] so I was like, "Sure, why not?"
So Maryjane gives me her bullet [pictured below next to the K, but used for any drug you might want to snort] and I head to the bathroom of the second-trendiest hotel bar in the city.
This is K.
This is coke.
Ensconed in a stall, I take a nice, fat snort. But as soon as I sniff, I know something's wrong. It doesn't quite smell like coke. It doesn't drip-tickle nicely. It hurts my nostril a bit more than good coke should. And it doesn't set my heart immediately aflutter. Increasingly perturbed, I look close at the bullet. It looks like white powder, but white powder could be anything from cocaine to ketamine to meth. I rule out meth-- meth hurts like hell when snorted [which I've only done twice and will never, ever do again]. Praying that it's just mediocre cocaine or that I'm out of practice when it comes to cocaine detection, I head out of the bathroom and rejoin Famke and Maryjane at the bar. I slip the bullet back to Maryjane while she smiles at me.
MARYJANE: "It's good stuff, isn't it?"
ATLAS: "Um, well." [how to put this delicately?] "It was a bit harsh on the nostrils, I guess. Maybe I'm just out of practice."
MARYJANE: "Are you kidding, this is the smoothest sh*t I've ever had."
ATLAS: "Are you sure, because seriously, it didn't really feel like coke?"
Suddenly Maryjane looks worried.
Seeing this exchange, Famke now looks worried.
FAMKE: "What do you mean, 'oops'?"
MARYJANE: "I, uh, I have two bullets. I think I gave you the one with the K in it."
ATLAS: "Oh sh*t. I think it's starting to kick in."
For those not in the know, Ketamine, or simply "K" is a tranquilizer originally designed for use in animals. Essentially, the sensation is comparable to feeling like you're swimming as you walk around, plus it makes you move/think slower and generally not be able to function very well. Take too much and you fall into a 'K hole' which I've heard is only slightly preferable to death by thousands of paper cuts. Alcohol heightens these effects and you shouldn't, I repeat, SHOULD NOT, drink and take K. Cocaine, on the other hand, is a stimulant and generally just makes you feel happy, energetic and chatty and I highly recommend drinking if you're going to do the yayo.
Anyway, long story short, I puked a bit later, Famke had to drive home, I was really messed up and the whole experience just sucked. The lesson kids, is that you shouldn't ingest strange drugs. And while you're at it, don't take candy from strangers.