Clawing to escape the belly of the beast here in Hollywood. To commiserate, email my name assistantatlas at yahoo.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Whisper Price Game: Former Child Stars Edition

Today's Whisper Price Game will let you let loose on your favorite, and not-so-favorite actors who made it big before they could vote. Remember, the object of the Whisper Price Game is to guess how much it would cost to get these stars into your movie. After all, you don't want to over-offer. The other object is to see what hilarious scorn you can heap onto those on the list you don't like.

is first because she's had [thus far] the career to which all child actors aspire. According to her IMDB profile, she began acting at the tender age of 2, and earned an Oscar nomination for Taxi Driver, when she was all of [Jesus is that right?]fourteen. She went on to win Oscars for "The Accused" and "Silence of the Lambs". So we know she's a great actress, and that's got to count for something. The question is how much.

was probably my first tv crush back in her "Who's the Boss?" days. Her career veered off course into crappy TV movies and straight-to-video crap when that show ended, and she very nearly became a has-been. But then, inexplicably, Charmed became a hit and Milano was employed again. And when Shannon Doherty left the show, she leveraged her stardom into a producer credit [and a larger slice of the cash the show generated]. She's obviously learned her 'Who's the Boss' lessons and has a sense of humor about it [she her guest spot on 'Family Guy' for that] but is she a box office draw?

Once upon a time, was a teen heartthrob known as 'JTT'. He left "Home Improvement" to pursue other opportunities and believe it or not, went to Harvard--which theoretically explains the fact that he hasn't done much of note since then. Okay, technically, he did 'Speedway Junky' and guest spots on 'Veronica Mars', 'Smallville' and '8 Simple Rules', but he seems to be saving his real comeback for the mediocre-ly titled 'Invasion' with Nicole Kidman. Will it work? Is the world still interested in JTT? And would you pay to see him?

actually lives up to the publicity hack bio on IMDB that proclaims him the 'most famous and richest child star there ever was' [with the possible exception of Shirley Temple]. While he had a huge string of hits, beginning with 'Uncle Buck', his career petered out once he hit fifteen and lost forever his cute factor. His comeback, with roles in 'Party Monster', 'Saved' and the Michael Jackson trial, has been something of a non-starter, but he's still a recognizeable name/face. The question is, is that worth anything?

So there you are, some of the biggest former child stars in the galaxy. Come on, whisper some prices at me.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I tried to think of something funny to write, but seeing the decidedly-non-cute Macauley Culkin just depresses me and makes me feel old.

3:20 PM

Blogger LTNA said...

I'm not playing unless we can include Hayley Joel Osment and Andrew Lawrence.

5:30 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Once upon a time, I would've said that Jodie Foster didn't have a whisper price in the traditional sense. She seemed just to do the material she wanted, price be damned.
Then I saw Panic Room.
Jodie Foster: $17.5 mil for crap, variable for the good stuff
Alyssa Milano: $250K for anything
JTT: $100K because he's still reasonably attractive
Macauley Culkin: Are they even paying him anymore?

6:41 PM

Blogger cinekat said...

Is anyone else flashing back to "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane"?

3:59 AM

Blogger Should I Blog This? said...

Macauley Culkin is the only one I'd pay to be in a movie. His roles in Party Monster and Saved were great! The fact that he's fucked in the head and not afraid to show it is a bonus.

Foster is old an busted. She'd need to have a really good performance to make me want to pay her to do anything but hang herself.

Milano isn't a great actress but I'd pay her to be my slave for a night.

JTT should try something other than acting. He'll always be one of those kids from Home Improvement until he proves he can do some real acting.

5:34 PM


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