Nikki Finke Is The New Hotness: 6.16

Hi kids. Miss me? I'm back just because I need to do that thing where I praise people who don't totally suck. Because we could all use a little happy, no?

Nikki Finke is the only journalist I can think of working the Hollywood beat who is actually dedicated to reporting the truth about it, unblurred by the studios, agents, stars or anyone else for that matter.

She beats--consistently, easily, thoroughl--Variety and the Hollywood Reporter; both of which should be ashamed of themselves for not having more go-getters getting scoops like her.

Into this void comes Ms. Finke, a one-woman info-freakshow. If I want the truth about something going on in Hollywood, I go to her site.

And it's usually there, a cross-section of plausible theories and her analysis on the most credible one, reporting on various degrees of confirmation about stories when she can get it.
Check her shizz at: Deadline Hollywood Daily. Do it regularly.

Also, the other new hotness is Gail Collins, who has just officially become my new favorite newspaper columnist.

Why? I'd read her stuff before and she doesn't take herself too seriously, and is often quite funny, like a wry aunt who's led an interesting life but hits the bourbon a bit too hard these days...also because it's not your actual aunt that you'll have to drive to the hospital when she breaks her nose.

I hope she can take this as the compliment it's meant to be.

But what truly gives her this distinction of new favorite and the new hotness was that hers is destined to be the best distillation of the latest iteration of the Palin family drama in the entire history of the Palin family drama canon:

But surely, when it comes to combating teen pregnancy, the Palin family has done enough damage already. What worse message could you send to teenage girls than the one they delivered at the Republican convention: If your handsome but somewhat thuglike boyfriend gets you with child, he will clean up nicely, propose marriage, and show up at an important family event wearing a suit and holding your hand. At which point you will get a standing ovation.

Just...yes.

Well done, ladies.

The cookies above? All yours.

Why Wonkette Rules: 6.14

I hate politics.

I really do.

I talk about it/them a lot, but only because I have to. Because politics, like media, is intimately tied to almost every important idea in 21st century America/Amurika.

So that sux.

If you haven't heard of it, Wonkette.com is a satirical website about politics that used to be a part of the Gawker Empire. But like many great ideas in Hollywood, they were spun off.

One its defining memes of late has been TruckNutz, which Hollywooders who've been around for awhile will remember as a meme from a certain script readers' website.

But Wonkette's importance extends far beyond memes. It is part of a new breed of media that makes the horrific, gruesome business of politics more palatable. And the only way that that can be accomplished is through absurdist mockery. Because yes, we have descended that far.

I mean, what do you expect? Culture has supposedly been declining since at least culture began, so it can't be that much of a surprise.

I mean, really, look at how much I smoke.

The only sane reaction to a politics that subverts every ideal, that corrupts every policy, that breeds cynicism and apathy, is wholesale rejection. And what better way to do that than with snarky sarcasm?

Like always, I don't have any financial (or any other) interest in seeing them succeed beyond wanting the awesomely funny to succeed.

So as always I urge you, Angelenos, reject reality by being that person who reads books (and a few good blogs).

Support Hillary and Work in Media? You're a Traitor: 6:06

I apologize for the provocative title, but I had to get your attention, didn't I?

Because this Hollywood assistant has something to say about politics.

My generation isn't supposed to be into politics because....why again? I've forgotten if there are any other excuses for young people not being engaged besides apathy...

Are there any more excuses? With us youngins being into the interwebs and being all connected and shizznit. We know the score. Lauryn Hill told us.

So this goes out to all the media folk...I urge you to do something you don't normally do-- to remember the past to change the future.

Remember when Hillary, pre-9/11, tilted at videogame and Hollywood violence windmills?
She did.

And it brought the heat down, and certainly delayed the recognition of videogames as both art and a desireable high-tech industry.

Of course, like a lot of her policies, it was a lot of hot air and relatively little action.

Even hubby Bill dissed the admittedly left-wing Sistah Souljah to distance himself from the left wing. The Clintons know how to exploit the fear of Hollywood to win votes in the Heartland.

And in these times when we know the government listens to everything anyway, that's going to have a horribly chilling effect on us media drones who are already afraid to do anything that might get us in trouble with our corporate masters.

Plus, it's pretty much a given these days that people vote for whichever candidate they'd want to have a beer with. Seriously, think back. It goes back to at least the 50s. Think about it.

Do you want to get a beer with Hillary Rodham Clinton? Does anyone?

Here's the thing: I'm afraid the Republicans might somehow win with Giuliani or Law & Order's Fred Thompson. And that would be a catastrophe. But Hillary is just divisive enough to make it happen.

Would you rather get a beer with Rudy Giuliani or Hillary Rodham Clinton? Hillary or Fred Thompson, who seems like he would get kinda drunk and start telling awesomely hilarious dirty stories?

I think he would.

But who doesn't want to have a beer with their new black friend, President Barack Obama? No one. Unless they're racist. And that's only like a third of the voting age population nowadays.

Plus, now would be a good time for a constitutional law professor to take over, what with the complete disregard for the law this Bush administration has embodied? And Hill's not exactly been one to follow the letter of the law herself. Whitewater, anyone?

And Obama's got experience-- as a humble state senator for 8 years, before being a Senator for a couple, plus the whole constitutional law professor, editor of the Harvard Law Review, and community organizer in Chicago for 3 years thing(s).

And it's about effing time we gave a black man a go at the presidency. Besides it being time, just think of how that could restore our dreams a little, and the world's in us even more. And we could use that...a lot.

Also, Barack Obama is part Kansan. And we all know Jesus was a Kansan. At least, that was the slogan of a friend of mine who is dead now. She was awesome while she was around. She'd be an Obama girl, I think.

And finally, media peeps, I think even those of us who find ourselves working for Fox would find it amusing that a show on that network, run by right-winger Joel Surnow no less, could pave the way for a black President so effectively.


Above, future American President Barack Hussein Obama....wait, his middle name is Hussein? We'll even have Arab street cred!

And yes, Senator Obama, that does mean you have to send a thank-you note to Dennis Haysbert. But not to Joel Surnow, unless you're feeling generous.

Oh, and why don't I support John Edwards? Why the seemingly automatic allegiance to Obama?

Besides the proven facts indicating Obama is awesome, it's because Edwards is a douche who gets $400 haircuts.

Internet TV's Infancy Is Awesome: 6.01

Like the Sopranos, my last season ended with a whimper, not with a bang.

So that's what the Sopranos universe is about, apparently.

As Net TV gets underway, the Sopranos might go down as one of the best that "broadcast" had to offer.

Personally, I don't think it'll go down so adverserially.

Among the birth pangs are a plethora of adamantly bizarre videos and audios, and the "canon" of early Internet video is still a bit too young to be properly categorized. However, there is still stuff you need to understand to understand the birth pangs of the internet's TV revolution:

broadband
Andy Samberg
The Long Tail

Among the signs that TV on the net is taking off:

About a year later, Google doesn't yet regret buying YouTube for $1.5 billion, a price that may yet prove prescient.

Shows are still selling on iTunes, but they're going even faster over the P2P networks. This means more and more people are watching and enjoying moving pictures on the interwebs.

My favorite new show is now playing at Channel101.com. It's called Unicorn Planet. Yes, that's right. It's called Unicorn Planet, and I like it. So what?

Fine, I will admit, I am a white, twentysomething hetero white male and I like a little Internet TV show called "Unicorn Planet." And yes, it is the gayest thing ever. And juvenile. But that's a good part of the appeal.

Dude, it's effing funny. Just watch. It explains everything you need to know in the first, oh, twenty seconds or so. But watch the whole thing, it's less than two and a half minutes.

And if you're still reading this blog, you've got two and a half minutes to kill.

Just watch Unicorn Planet:



Come on, that's hilarious. Dude, my gay friends are all about it, so I know it can't be anti-gay, which means it's totally okay to laugh at.

As we all know, if you want to know if something or someone is homophobic, ask a gay. If you want to know if something is racist, ask an African-American, or, these days, a Mexican-American, or a Mexican in America. Sexist? Call the feminists...

Yada, yada.

Anyway...I think it's funny, and a hopeful sign that we may all soon be able to jump ship and just produce random stuff for the Long Tail. Because if I was an exec, I would pick this up for a run on Adult Swim, or Midnight Spank [run more Ninja Warrior!], or whatever.

As soon as web video becomes profitable, I'm jumping ship from corporate-dum. De dum-dum...


Planet Unicorn 2

Planet Unicorn 3

Planet Unicorn 4

UPDATE: OMG William Shatner pimping Planet Unicorn is awesome. Please see below. Dude, I knew I backed the right horse on this project. So to speak.




TECHNORATI TAGS: new media, planet unicorn, internet, television, sopranos, long tail